2010
08.14

An undercurrent of gray, wet with the sea, and dragged through these coastal canyons transforms scenery here today, from the robust August sunlight, to the first faint hits of fall. I’m not ready for summer to shimmy off to Southern climes, I may just have to follow her, begging at her heels for more.

Trees hang papered and peppered with moss and lichen. Tan oaks, rhododendrons and huckleberry shelter under the tallest redwoods. Gray rock, and green in every variation fan out below me. The female forms of California coastal hills spread their undulating selves in every direction.

The Red Hot Chili Peppers seep under and through the barn wall, between where I sit with my internet connection and my father’s tenant’s place. It’s a strange and perfect sound track to this evening’s musings.

Tomorrow I’ll head to Marin, and then into the city to see Johnny Nitro at The Saloon and a possible stop in at Biscuits and Blues. I want to dance with abandon, feel the music and see my old home turf.

I keep waiting for a sign, a deep pull and pulse that says yes, that’s it, that’s the place, or face, or sound, or smell that turns me in my tracks and sets a new course to follow. Until that fated day I will keep wandering with an open mind and heart, feeling into my future by slowly wadding into what’s receptive and compelling. I will continue to write and sing and design and notice the beauty in the world.

Thanks for listening,

Annie xox

2010
08.12

I got in to Ashland, Oregon at 6pm yesterday evening from my trip to BC. It was a wonderful journey in so many ways, about 1,400 mile total. About a mile after the road turned from asphalt to gravel on my way out of North Bend, BC, a young brown bear crossed the road in front of me. I stopped the car and looked back, it was on its hind legs peering at me over the bushes on the side of the road. It looked as curious about me as I was about it. after a bit of staring, I put the car in reverse to see if I could get closer, and it bolted in to the brush. It was beautiful thing to see. I’ve always identified with bear medicine, in the native tradition, so it felt like it was a good omen to me.

I learned a lot from our teacher Tom Kimmel, and from the other participants in the seminar. Although songwriting is an art form, it has some rules that were good to get clearer about. I would highly recommend both Tom as a teacher, and REO as a place to go to reconnect with nature, river rafting, and to learn more about music and writing. They have some great retreats there every summer.

The Nahatlatch River was a constant roar in the background. It flowed a powerful jade and tourmaline green and provided a white noise factor that took some getting used to! The tent cabin I shared was at the edge of the beautiful river, the food at REO was creative, plentiful and wonderful. The other participants were a selection of wonderful people from all over Canada and parts of the US.

Other then what I learned from Tom, and listening to everyone’s great music, my favorite part of the seminar was co-writing with Lowry Olafson. We were all given a title “There And Back Again,”to work into a song one way or another.  I love collaboration, and it was a great to to work with Lowry. It was also interesting to hear what everybody else came up with for the same title.  I think Lowry and I wrote a pretty good song start all and all,  and I look forward to finishing it up with him! Because it was cold that day, we ended up in one of the washrooms to write. This bathroom was pretty lux, it had power, WiFi and was quieter and much warmer then on the deck.

I came away from the song camp wanting more. More instruction, more tools, more creativity, more collaboration, and more musical knowledge. I want to up my personal game and become a better writer and musician over all. It was good to be challenged and stimulated, just what I needed!

The drive home was harder. It felt longer then the drive up, and a bit of residual grief resurfaced. I have a medical test tomorrow that I am looking forward to having behind me, with good results. I also look forward to a trip down to the Bay Area either tomorrow or Saturday,  and then going to Burning Man the last week of this month with my friend Kia.

I am researching other songwriting classes both here and abroad. The world seems to opening herself to me. And honestly, I am a traveler and explorer at heart. How can I resist what’s around the next bend, and corner, and who I might meet along the way, after all it could be you!

Thanks for listening,

Annie xox

2010
08.03

It’s always a quandary how much to reveal, and how much to hide or obscure in a post. I always tend to lean towards reality and truth. I hope to never offend. I’m not writing to elicit a response, but to clarify myself to myself and perhaps be an example of an artist finding her way through her life.

So, here I am again, after so much water has slipped and slid under the proverbial bridge. It feels like a lifetime ago that I last wrote here on this digital page. I was high and happy, had new found love, and possibilities seemed to be exploding into stars -  I was hanging on everyone of them, swinging through them like I was on some kind of cosmic money bar.

It’s truly amazing the passage I’ve traveled. From newly alone after a marriage to newly coupled, then uncoupled and now totally unfettered. I thought there was not too much more to sacrifice, or surrender and yet there was…

This giant clearing has happened, and although it was traumatic and difficult, heart wrenching and grief laden, I am passing through the storm and gaining traction on the other side.  I’ve learned so much about the taste of love and companionship, the scent of home and the deep feeling of tidal grief. There has been healing of the monumental kind, as well as the uncovering of old patterns worn deep, and then new pathways chosen.  I feel honored to have participated in it all. In time-line order -  my band, marriage, house, boyfriend, and car are all behind me now. All part of what was, and what has helped to shape and define me, and I am grateful for the learning and all the participants involved.

Just to be clear, if I have to lay it down and surrender still further, know that I am willing. Whatever it takes to renew, regather and move on from this place to the next phase. I have real hope that the internal resurrection has begun, and that I will relearn to stand solidly in my own corner, having my own back, very soon.

This weekend I am taking the first stand in my future, I’m driving to BC in my bright new car, headed to a song camp with Tom Kimmel in Boston Bar, British Columbia at the REO Rafting Resort. I hope to learn a lot more about becoming the best songwriter that I can be.

Shasta in the back ground

My muse has been a busy girl! Songs and poetry have been pouring forth. I’ve written 40 songs and 41 poems since the beginning of the year. More arrive every day.

As to what is next, I am waiting for that internal signal to point the direction to where I need to be next in this wide world. I’ve day dreamed about a trip through Thailand, Bali and Australia. I’ve imagined being back on the Charles Bridge in Prague singing along with the buskers.  I’ve thought about swimming in the deep azure waters of the Aegean and losing myself in the sun and slow warmth. New York and all it’s amazing layers, call out to my creativity. The hills of Marin and my many friends down there hold an allure that’s hard to deny…

In the meantime I am hiking daily all over southern Oregon and California with my girl Bella.

I am enjoying beautiful meals and time with my best girlfriends, and I am reengaging with my creative self. Who knows what’s next – time will tell.

I am looking forward to meeting a musical partner to write and play with. To finding “Home” where ever that is, (god knows it could be right around the corner.) And finding myself in the next phase of my life.

Thanks for listening,

Annie xox

2010
03.11

So about proclamations and declarations…

Proclamations: the formal act of proclaiming; giving public notice
Declarations: an explicit or emphatic statement

Sometimes one has to backtrack…. Delicately reframing the original statement, making changes as one does when all has changed yet again.  Back in January I made a public statement on this blog that I was headed south. Back to the cradle of my childhood, back to Marin County and the bigger music scene, back to where the hills call my name….

And then some more change came my way. And some of you all who are kind enough to follow my blog and music life say, “Are you just back visiting, or have you moved yet?” and I say sheepishly, um… well you see, I haven’t left, I’m not sure I’m leaving after all, I met someone here, and so surprisingly enough, I am still here.” And things always change, so who knows, right? I could end up in Europe or Asia or somewhere much more mundane, but god I hope not!

So, here’s what’s true for now. I am writing with two guitarists in California, Steve Wolf, who I wrote “Forget About Love” with, and Byron Fry an amazing composer and musician in So Cal.  Songs are pouring out of me. I have written two more in the last day. I am happily accepting design and coaching clients.

I am also doing some new work with Rob Gunderson, a guitarist from Grants Pass, (thanks Mr. King for the reference.) I am getting more Design and Color clients every day and am so excited to be working – wahoo!!! The Mistress Mind book is nearing completion of its first major edit. My wonderful business partners and I will be giving our first three day seminar in late summer or early fall.

So yes, Marin still calls out to me, I love it there, and I am planning on lots of visits to my beautiful friends, and lots of music and design work down there this year. I am also going to put my beautiful Ashland house on the market that I gutted and redesigned a few years back, and downscale my life a bit on the financial front. Here’s a link to an article about it when it was first finished. If you have any interest, let me know! I am happily dating a great new guy and life is surprising, exciting, and full of possibility, which is just how I like it.

I hope this finds you all well and happy too. I am hoping to be doing some house concerts in the near future and get back out regularly on the music scene. The Rogue Suspects have been kind enough to include me in a live recording session and are generous enough to invite me to join them fairly regularly. I am a lucky, lucky woman indeed. I will try my best to be more prudent when making declarations and proclamations, and knowing me, I will most likely do it again. Thanks for your understanding, in advance!

All the best, and thank you for listening and all your support!

Annie xox

2010
03.10

Travel always soothes my soul, brings me deeper into myself and expands my horizon lines. It also gives me the space to hear my muse. This February I traveled with my wonderful friend Christine to Mexico. Christine and I have been friends for over 20 years. She lives up in Montana and we were both craving some warmth and sun.

We flew into Puerto Vallarta, and stayed in a cool old hotel in the Zona Romantica, the old part of Vallarta, for the first night and then took the 45 minute water taxi south to Yalapa for 4 days. We then returned by water taxi and took a local bus up the coast 45 minutes to Sayulita, a surfing and fishing village. I have to say I loved Yalapa. It’s crescent shaped bay held all that I needed. Sleepy, quiet, sweet, great food and beach. We snorkled, swam, sunned and took a boat out to the islands. We saw humpback whales breaching and angelfish meeting the boat in swarms of yellow and blue. Sayulita was good, but not quite the feeling I was after, it felt busy and hectic after Yalapa. It’s beaches are made to surf from. The Pacific angles in just right to provide the swells and breaks needed for a surf school. There are a lot of cool rentals and a lot of North Americans. I liked the feeling of San Poncho, just to the North a bit better – more artsy and less busy.

Here’s some poetry from the trip:

Truth Came Knocking

Truth came knocking today
She asked some pertinent questions
How do I feel?
What do I want?
Where am I headed?
And where is my heart in all this?

I said I am riding your waves
Each one has a new face
Each one rolls out after the other
I feel into them poised to ride or fall
Your whim is my rudder
Your possibilities my wind

Truth asked, what direction will you head?
I answered, the one that’s new, the one that calls and beckons me on
The one that smells like love
The one that tastes like home

Truth raised her head and looked me in the eye
My child she said, how will you know?
I returned, I will follow my heart for it never leads me astray
It’s always right. I just have to listen deeply
It will reveal it’s self, just as you do

Truth nodded her shining head and replied
Hearts are maps to love
Truly knowing yours is the first step
I will whisper in your left ear and
Vulnerability will whisper in the right
Listen closely to our council and ride towards the sun

A. McIntyre – Feb 2010

Mexico

Jasmine and diesel
Gardenia and dust
Snoozing Mexican dogs
Sun baked on the verges of muddy roads

Low blue-bellied clouds slide slowly
Across the pale bleached sky
Where hilltops pierce through
Verdant green

Roosters do their best to out do each other morning noon and night
Doves soothe, and Minas talk trash

Tropical colors dance in the smoke
Of smoldering bonfires
Shy sweet signoras
Tow their children
Who wear smiles like flowers

And the sea, ever restless
Meets the edges of the world
Again and again and again

A. McIntyre – Feb 2010

Morning Slides Over Sayulita

Morning slides over Sayulita
Uncovering the soft subtle rustle
Of birds wings
The sound of brooms
Swinging in rhythm
Pushing dust like Sisyphus and his rock in an unending ritual

The tinny songs of the propane vendor and agua purveyors
The incessant cry of the cocks
Asserting the superiority of their
Backyard kingdoms

The rumble of dump trucks
Down cobbled streets
An engines loud cough
The whine of a two stroke and an occasional voice
Christine whistling softly
To an internal tune

A trumpet plays unsteadily
More passion then talent
The surf incessant in the far back
Reaches of the background

Another morning in Mexico
Feet cold on the tile squares
Coffee brewing
Two more days till home

A. McIntyre – Feb 2010

Cool Humidity

Cool humidity before the sun
Slams the streets

Colors transform in early light
Gliding from dark shadows
To pearlescent pink and terracotta

Grays become green in the
Gathering light Chameleon like

The tide reaches high up the shore
Surfers hang suspended
In the first rays of the sun

My heart lifts for home.
Butterflies flit about
My lower abdomen
Suddenly nervous
After all this time

A. McIntyre – Feb 14 2010

2010
01.25

Hey Beautiful people,

It’s been quite a while since I’ve blogged. I had some technical issues that got in the way and then there was all the rest of the stuff…. My life is a adventure and full of change.

Here’s the latest news: Last Thursday I got on stage for the first time in a long long time. It felt like home. I love singing and performing with a big band and a big audience. Thank you to the Rogue Suspects for having me up. And thanks to all who helped with the benefit for Haiti. It was an amazing night. I have a writing session with Dean Angermeier, of the Rogue Suspects tomorrow. Bret Levick and I are going to finish Fillaree very soon. Jeff Pevar, and Inger Jorgensen and I have talked loosely about putting together a musical review with Cornflower and Jaese Lecuyer. I hope we can all find the way to make it happen this year! And last but not least, The Suspects have issued an open invitation to sit it with them. I think they will be learning some of me songs too! I love music, it’s my passion and I’m devoted to it.

For those of you who don’t know me, I am a singer, a songwriter, a designer and color specialist with McIntyre Interiors, I am a co founder of the Mistress Mind and most of all I am a woman who loves transformation and seeks a greater understanding of herself in the world.

If you’ve been following along over the past year, you will know that my band AnnieMac dissolved last spring  after recording our last single, then the housing market changed the amount of design work I was receiving, and then the state of my  marriage changed as well. This is not a lament, it’s just the facts of my life. I know I am not alone in change. So many of us have been going through it.

As for my marriage changing, I am blessed with having an incredible friend whom I love so very much. After a lot of thought and deep work we both came to the difficult conclusion that we are not the right romantic partners for one another. He is amazing and brilliant and I have so much respect and love for him. And as we change what has been, I know that we will be part of each others lives forever.

Throughout the last year I have mostly stayed on top of the wave of change, riding it with my eye on the horizon, looking for deeper truth and understanding, and occasionally I’ve gone under, tumbling along the rough sea floor before surfacing again gasping for air.

For now it seems my seas have calmed, I feel as if the biggest part of the swirl is over and I have direction again. There may be some turbulence, that’s just a part of it all, but now I see a way to move and be moved, in both the literal and figurative definitions of the word. Motion and music beckons me and I am following.

As you may know I’ve been searching for a new location, I looked at Nashville, and Asheville, thought about Austin, New York, Portland, Seattle and Chicago. I was on the hunt for more music opportunities, as well as a way to make a living in the mean time.

About a week and a half ago I drove my mom down to the Bay Area. As I left Vallejo behind me and drove across the salt marsh on highway 37, my heart expanded. I breathed in the fresh  salty air, saw the sun reflecting off the vibrant green of newly sprouted grass and I knew I was home. Joy infused my heart. I had to move back to Marin.  The rest of the day I was filled with knowing. This knowing has stayed with me – it’s the right choice for now. I will miss Ashland and my incredible community. I will be back and forth a lot to visit and gig. There is sadness in leaving, and joy in moving. A complicated heart beat.

There were a few people I meant to see on my trip that I didn’t, and some that I saw that confirmed to me that my choice was a good one. I have a girl friend who is about 2 months ahead of me in the relationship change. She is already in Marin and will be my new room mate. I’ll be moving in April, and will be down in the meantime making music and design contacts. If you have ideas, send them my way!

My business partners in the Mistress Mind and I are in the midst of writing a book about our work. It’s an exciting process, and I love it. Once the book is finished we will be giving seminars and changing lives. I am so exited about what we have put together.

So, here’s what I need: A beautiful and affordable rental in Marin for Kia and I. Three bedrooms, so we each have one and also have a guest room for all our Ashland friends. Some fun design and color work to pay the bills, and a new musical project with players that are way better then me. Not too much to ask right?

Thanks for following along. I am sending love and gratitude. Thanks for listening,

Annie xox

2009
11.23

The following is also a letter to my fan base:

Hello Beautiful People,

I hope you are all doing well in the days before Thanksgiving. The light this morning was so clear, sharp and extremely beautiful and for some reason it made me think of all of you. I guess I have gratitude on the brain.  Thank you all again for the support of my music, and also the support on my latest travels. Because of some of you, I met some incredible new friends and music contacts in the South East.

Have you all been reading the details on my Blog? If not, the link is http://anniemacmusic.com/blog Here you can read about my adventures on the road, the trip to Asheville, Nashville and points in between. It was one of the most incredible trips I’ve ever taken. I am home with renewed focus, energy and love for who I am and what I do.  I am currently writing up a storm – 5 new songs this week and about 20 more ready to record when I find the funds.

I’d love to hear back from you about what you are grateful for this year.  Share your stories on my Blog in the comments section, or email me back in person.

As we approach the holidays you may be looking for presents for friends and family – I wanted to plug some gift opportunities here:

The first are Soul Reminders – these are cards that my husband Jeff designed and I helped with. They celebrate the divinity within us all – http://www.divedeeppress.com/reminders.htm they are available both as the deck and beautiful greeting cards.

The second is a book that may change the way you look at living – Marley Rides I can’t recommend it enough. I know Marley’s mother Jennifer who is the author, and even knowing the story first hand, this book opened up my heart even bigger. What a life and what a story -  http://www.marleyrides.com/

The third is my CD Ignition or my single – I know a lot of you already have it, but maybe someone in your life needs some more music in it! http://www.cdbaby.com/cd/anniemacmus

Thanks for listening and lots of love,

Annie xox

2009
11.19

I left Nashville last Saturday night after another eventful day in the city. Woke up early and had breakfast at the reliable Cracker Barrel, went for a fun motorcycle ride through the west side of Nashville and then on to Music Row, and ended with having an awesome dinner with Gary Allan Patrick who is an amazing artist and songwriter. I met him through my vocal teacher Ken Orsow. They are song writing partners and are going to make a BIG splash together when Gary releases his next CD. I can’t wait to hear it!

I left about 8pm and drove East towards Asheville. I made it to Monterey, Tennessee where I suddenly had a bad stomach problem. I stayed the night at a Super 8 that happened to be right there on the exit. I must say it was really nice room and perfectly situated for me. Being sick on the road by yourself is truly a drag – yuck. I had a lot of driving the next day and it was difficult to do it alone, but I made it back to the loving home of my friends O’Neal and Pete. I loved staying there again and having some real home cooked yummy food. I really don’t want to offend anyone, but I just don’t get the grits and gravy thing – sorry!

The next time I go back,  I may just spring for the GPS system you can rent with the car. I am good with directions and I still found the freeway numbering system out there confusing. One freeway can have three different numbers and two cardinal directions on it at the same time… Crazy making! If I had a copilot it would be different, my iPhone rocks, but it’s hard to read and drive + not a good or legal idea!

Monday I flew back to SFO. On arrival I heard that my dad was in the hospital with a bad stomach thing too. Wired timing – us McIntyre’s and our stomachs… My dad doesn’t recommend the hospital he stayed in. Not a great experience, but he is better and back home thank god! After going and visiting him at Kaiser Vallejo Tuesday morning, I drove up to Ashland with my friend Kia.

We dropped through thick cloud on the north side of the Siskiyou Pass and the valley and Ashland appeared below. A shinning beacon in the fog. I am so happy to be home.

I’ve been incorporating the lessons of both parts of the trip. My seminar was outstanding, profound and life changing. If any of you have an interest in knowing more, I’m happy to email you about it, just ask. The music part of the trip was eyeopening and a wonderful learning experience. I look forward to a collaboration with the wonderful Melody Guy, and I can see going out to Nashville for 2-3 months and doing some intensive work on my writing. I’ve been working on a new song about forgiveness that I wrote during the seminar. And, I can’t wait to find that new co-writer I am looking for. Where are you anyway?

There is a lot of change in the air for so many of us these days. I hope you can meet it with love and compassion as I am doing my best to do.

Sending love and thanks again for your support and listening,

Annie xox

2009
11.13

Hey beautiful people,

I was describing my experience to Eddie Bayers yesterday after leaving our third recording studio for the day.  I said,  I think Nashville is like a Disneyland for musicians, he agreed. I got to shadow him through three sessions at three recording studios – Beaird, Omni Sound and Legands. The songs I heard recorded ran the gamut from good to excellent.

I heard some of Nashville’s best players, and writers and some real Legends like Hargus “Pig” Robbins. “Robbins’s distinct style can be heard on … Charlie Rich’s “Behind Closed Doors” and Crystal Gayle’s “Don’t It Make Your Brown Eyes Blue,” and he also played on classic hits by … Patsy Cline, George Jones, Brenda Lee, Loretta Lynn, Roger Miller, Dolly Parton, Conway Twitty, Porter Wagoner, and Tammy Wynette, among others.” Nashville Cats Interview

Dannt at the board at Legends Studio

Danny at the board at Legends Studio

I also met Al Anderson -  formally of  NRBQ. He is an amazing song writer and man he had a hot new one last night. I gave it a 10 when asked.

I sat next to Debra, Porter Wagoner‘s daughter on the couch at Omni Sound. What a sweet woman. She and the session players told amazing stories of  behind the scenes antics at the Grand Ole Opery. I heard some amazing tales! Her dad was known as Mr. Grand Ole Opery and worked with Dolly Parton for years. Wow what a day.

Tonight I am headed out to hear Melody Guy at Second Avenue Live. She is a new connection for me. We’ve talked on the phone and she seems like such a cool woman. Plus I love her music!

Oh, I also started two new songs today!

Till next time, thanks for listening.

Annie xox

2009
11.11

Asheville, North Carolina is an amazing town. It’s quirky, friendly and beautiful. I took 5 days and changed my life there last week. It’s hard to put into words, but I’ve found a way to heal my heart and I feel free in my skin for the first time in memory. All is I can say is Waahooo! Thank you Jennifer for the suggestion.

I stayed a day after the seminar and hung out with fellow participants. We ate breakfast at the City Bakery Cafe (yum) and had awesome hot stone massages at Sensibilities Spa and then drove and hiked along the Blue Ridge Parkway. It was  glorious.

I then headed to Nashville by car. I followed a detour from I40 (closed due to a rock slide) through the mountains and across the French Broad river several times. It rained almost the entire way, creating misty views of ridge tops and rivers,  but cleared up as I got closer to Nashville. The city center sparkled with the last glow of the setting sun.

Today I hung out with the legendary and very kind Eddie Bayers at the Beaird Music Group studios today. It was so cool to get a behind the scenes view of a successful Nashville recording studio. I met a string of songwriters who each came in with a song. Six songs recorded in 3 hours -  totally cool – what incredible session players – wow.

I want to thank everyone that sent me suggestions of people to talk to and meet on my trip. I am making some great connections, and I have more meetings set for later on this week. I am so excited! I’ve been writing some new songs all in all this has been a great trip so far.

I’ll write again soon. Lots of love, and thank you again for your support! I can’t wait to get back out there and make music!!!

All the best,

Annie xox